Tuesday, April 9, 2013

Career Choices of Parents vs Their Child

Journey have been a ride since.

In a flashback moment, I realize I have spoken to quite a number of people if not parents or student themselves. Many a times strangers I have meet come up to me with a question like this:

1) How did you manage to find your passion or doing what you love doing now?

2) How did you convince your parents?

3) My son / daughter love this, but i find that Engineer would be a great prospect for them (Scenario 1)

4) I have no idea what She/ He like, but keep telling me I love singing Dancing and stage, or drawing (Scenario 2)

5) Professional jobs are so good in the industry..... I think I would like to study business cause my friends in it.

6) Parent asked them back : Are you really interested in it or just because you are following your friends?

7) When I suggest them to give time to their kids like 6 months or a year to figure what they want... Parents say oooohh tooo long... (scenario 3)

The big question: What do I want to study after form 5

1) Situation:  You are now Final Year of High School Student Not Knowing what you want or do not know how to express it in words.

2) Situation : You know what you want to do but got confuse because third party implanting ideas or opinion of their and make it like you wanted it badly but that is not

3) Situation: You know exactly what you want to do after Form 5 which is working. You do this is to make sure you make no wrong decision before further study in it BUT..... third party say no and wasting time was of the reason.

4) Situation: You know you want to work first and then study, but third party reason behind is Make sure they finish study then work, cause when they work, they never want to go back to study because they are getting income and that diverse their attention.

So how?
Dear undergraduates, students, and fellow highly respected parents.

Speaking from a point where I come from and what I have experience, I am not extra ordinary from yourself, your student or your children. Have anyone heard of the word Dyslexia? Sounds alien to the community. Yes it is. Do you remember when you were younger your parents or adults used to say arg... this child is lazy, she does not like to write her homework, her handwriting is ugly or even multiple times of doing the same thing, but yet the result is the same. Yes I was and I am that young child. Even those younger days I have always think about why do I have to go to school? Is school just the ONLY place I could learn? Why School? I had never pass my subject in all the test in school till is UPSR, PMR, SPM, yes I pull through just like marginally pass.

I remember, never once in the class I could write the speed of the others when we have to copy down something. Not noticing there is something not right, and innocently believing that I was slow and lazy student just like how they perceive this child to be. (Imaging Labeling) I am being labeled lazy.

Many children in the community are suffering silently in pain just like how I was. Remembering those old time, everybody know I love talking but no one stood up and say she will be a famous emcee someday, a singer, or somebody very influential to the society. Even parents themselves shy away from the reality of this child ability. Thinking in their (Parents) mind I was good enough for LAW. Well, have they really seat down and think and analyze the God gifted strength to that child to pursue in something more than LAW just because is reputable.

Well, RM10k wasted 1 and the Half year there and the end product, nearly suffered from depression and lost track.

Well here is what I want to discuss and share and in hope with that, I hope I could Help Many out there who are lost and not knowing what to do.

MAD Girl Speaking to Young Adults (Teenagers):
Your pathway after form 5 will be :

1) Know exactly WHAT YOU WANT and you pursue straight to the course and parents agrees to it = Great pathway and wish well in the journey and all the best. ( Is the perfect Imaginary pathway for Parents)

2)  Know exactly WHAT YOU WANT BUT your parents DISAGREE to the course you choose because they think with your Intelligence and cleverness you SHOULD have pursue in PROFESSIONAL JOB = Crossroads, Dilemma and ( Parent's Nightmare and Tension will arise and argument of both saying their point)

3) Parent's financially constrain and work and study later

4) Parent disagree for you work because of focus and wasting of time but you insist in working.

5) Supportive parents (Children's Greatest Happiness and joy)

Dear teenagers,

Knowing one facts, they are your parents and no matter what happens, (beside illegal abuse and anything against the law) please know that each parent want their child to be successful and earn well and live well even if they do not have the ability. Parents are parents and someday we will be in that shoes and doing the same cycle.

But that does not mean the options for you is the ultimately best for you. REMEMBER, there is difference between best suit yourself and best suit you of what your parents think. Best suits you meaning you have to be comfortable and happy with the choice you make. Best Suit you of what your parents think meaning Your Parent think is the best options for you. Their choice making them yours. Clarify that. VERY Important.

But but..... ho.... I really want to pursue my dreams, my goals, okie look. You have to know the stability income that your both parent are earning. Down to factor please know that stability of income is so important to sustain the study years of the child. Especially in Malaysia, majority will opt for private Universities.

Not knowing what to study, simply take time off to work and find a job with office or something you can learn from. The skill work, in the kitchen, hotel, banquet, clerk, teller, office girl/ office boy. The longer you work you will come to a realization of what you want to do with your life and future plans.

If there is dilemma, try to relax your mind and close your eyes. Use your heart to see what is the image portray out.  That is the answer. Most time when this method is used the result would be they will go for something not painted in the image. The successful once will make it and shut the paper to their parent's mouth and do what they want after that.

The not struggling ones will fail and fail and till give up. Time wasted and come and go for the dreams.

MAD Girl Speaking to Parents,

Your highest, Parents,

Your motivation is the greatest strength you could give your children. Sometimes when you are worried about their future, you took charge and without knowing you have make decision for them. Is not wrong because it is mother nature born that way and nothing so wrong with that. Your support is the pillar of strength that you kids will come home to you and bow to you and say mum dad I love you so much because I am Lucky to be given the choice to choose my pathway and allow me to find my true self and happiness. Is the every parents dream that they could have the most grateful kid they could have.

Let them choose, asked them, lead them and not making decision for them. Always allow them to speak their heart out and let you know what are they thinking. Sometimes kids being kids not very good in words cannot express through words but actions. Allow them to shine in their gifted wisdom and talent. EACH one of the child is never a less smart kids. They are all smart but Smart in their own way in a place where they could shine so brightly.

Asked them is this what they really want to be, want to do and do it with their passion and heart. My parents thought me I will do anything if they pay me, but they never know why I am smiling each day. I smile despite my income in tight, I am satisfied with my job, I am happy to be where I am. contented and satisfactions is the ultimate true feeling of your child smiles.

I have a sister, academic A++ , professional job and doing well in her way. I am good in skills, I can organize and plan for events, learning to take care and teach the kids. I have my leadership skills in my way. That does not people are not good in Academic are not GOOD at their Gifted Skills. I totally agree to MADAM CHOW WAI LING, a believer in Home Schooling, Studies are not just structure education in schools and tuition, there are more education stuff besides just school.

I have wrote this in hope that Parents will get to understand one step deeper in to their children's mind and teenagers should have a difference perceptions on parents. Understanding and open up to talk and discuss will be a good start.

How I walk through discrimination and be here standing tall .... Next Topic.

For now.... Respect decisions....Support and you will see the glory shining upon him like a winner.

MAD Girl,
Pei Yee






Sunday, November 18, 2012

Love?

Love a big word. I have been doing fine and out of the blue I have the feeling of Blogging and yea the word called Love.

Months had past and bittersweet moments in my life. Seeing Couple reunited to be one, near or far related is just something I have been looking for so long. I am not so sure how will it turn out for me but certainly I am totally excited about what future brings.

Love happening all around us. The journey is definitely not the Happy ever After, Speaking of Which I am not too sure am I ready to be in love again. I miss the world once happen to me but is just hard when is heart broken and arguement. I am not sure how and what to do at times.

I used to have a mind to have a great family but now is more staying alone. The myth left inside me is always Am I ready to be in Love? Will I be able to handle them?

Love is a journey or two person to complete each other imperfection to be as one. You meet as friends, you date, you argue, you cry, you drink to drunk and to sleep, you come to compromise, you learn, you understand, you decide, you married, and Routine of Knowing and Learning about each other to be as one team is a life learning journey.

I love kids, to have a family of my own but I am just not ready.... to be in love. Or Probably the word Ready is never in the World of LOVE I suppose.

Monday, October 8, 2012

October 2012

Pretty fast month that have just gone by. Middle of my 6 weeks in Uni now. Life have been greats friends are coming and leaving for Good. Great friends are found over a period of ups and down in life. Looking back where things weren't so complicated.

Sigh.

At first thinkin October will be smoother than September but it was a rough month. Drama in life sometimes wakes you up to be a better person and it some sort of Self realization in a good way that you will need to learn. My sister is something I am always worried for. She is a princess conceptualize person in my mind. So delicate and so fragile at heart. Watching her going through dramas and her ups and her down is drastic motion.

Could it be simpler, Sometimes I do Wonder.

November will be a Busy month with Wedding and Performance. I have Exactly 8 weeks to survive through my degree. The most unlikeable term of all. The most not happy Season of Two Years.... Really Cannot wait to be ended. Funny thing is When I leave school I miss nothing when Everyone says you will miss school. I miss nothing. When I am in Diploma I know I will have the best of the Best Memories Ever....True enough. Degree meeting these people gives me nightmare and not a time that I wish I would like to keep it in my Memories.

Its been a therapy for me by doing dance and is a good Way I express myself!

Monday, August 20, 2012

Supernanny Advise Kuala Lumpur

Recently I have been addicted to a reality US show called Supernanny hosted by Jo Frost. Amazingly well her job and it drive me so much to help parents around klang valley to deal with their children through online.

I might not be the best nanny but I have the ability to read a children's mind when they are misbehaving and trying to get attention.

My two nephew had thought me so much and time out is a great thing. Smacking and spanking can be reduce and children will love you more instead.

I did discuss the issue with my mum on the online nanny service but the due the risk is high I would prefer giving advise and consultation.

I do not have kids myself but I love children as they are all beautiful children in Society. Education comes from school but the Ethnic and manners comes from home. Good Mother Bad Kids produce, disciplined Mother Great Kids.

House Routine
Time Out Method
Sleeping Separations
Break Barriers Between Parents and Children

Jo Frost has inspired me to help out as many parents in malaysia. Especially around Klang Valley.

Drop me a Comment in the my comment box and I will Reply you in a worse scenario drop me an email address and I will respond accordingly. Thank you.

Wednesday, August 15, 2012

What to do when you are single

Came across with question like this many a times. What do single people like me do? or you might have the feeling of loss and lonely. GET up single people!

Being single is fun and wonderful. Since i have been single 3 years now, and still counting. Wink. If you ever have the feeling of loss and lonely is actually normal. The feeling of not wanting to come out again to meet friends, isolate yourself in a room of your own. My advise to you, take it one step at a time. You can have all the time you want to be alone and since I have been there let me share my experience how I do it. Initially, the feeling lost and being very quiet attitude came to me. During this moment, I seat back a lot and realize the a lot of things such as how wonderful my parents were, feeling bad for sometimes raising my voice at them, funny moment, and some sentimental moment with them that I cried to myself most time.

Moving on from there, I started to have friends around me. CHOOSE your friend WISELY. haha. Ended up with only some friends that truly did not judge me but stood by me through all troubles. Many friends will want to come near you to get STORY and then leave but true friends they will always be by your side and share with you their support if not they will support you with words they have. I am counting my blessings each day many have left and the remaining is hand few and still I would say we are supporting and learning from each other in one way or another.

Life was much better after all the hard times and bad karma. I have begin to read books psychology of men and study about their nature and I could see it what a guy action. I have the answer for it. In the end, when my friends have bad times with their Guy they will look for me and I will explain to them what are the situation and how it happen. It became a group and discussion and now is like a group page among ourselves.

Being Single in this Semester break have given me the greatest time of all.
1) Manage to have all the time to myself
2) Cook for my family every weekdays and off on Weekends.
3) Improve on my cooking skills which mum and dad love my food
4) Cooking for Grandma everyday and serving her healthy and nice food that she crave so much every evening
5) Going to the market in the morning with grandma to buy fresh ingredients to cook

People might think i am silly enough to have my one month holiday to do all this, but think about it what are the other times that you could do all this if not when you are on holiday and break.

Many website or bloggers might say shopping, travel etc.... but what if money is the constrain.

It's been three weeks now I have been cooking for grandma. It place a smile on my face when she asked me what I cook. The feeling is just so so amazing.

Singles does not mean you are boring or lonely, it means you are having the time of your life before having commitment. Enjoy it while you can.


Monday, July 30, 2012

Grandma

I remember taking her to the mall and she even shop with me for dresses. How brilliant my grandma was. That was like 4 years back in time.

I had an amazing day today. I finally get my feet to move the Samba. Its been so long and finally is here. My day even got better because mum finally realize what I was trying to tell her. I was please because I reminded my mum that life is a cycle.

Today makes it extra special for me. Grandma came to our house for dinner. She rarely come to our home for that. I remember when she first got her stroke attack, I insisted to take her to the chinese Medicine right after Classes. Usually it will take two hours and By the time i am home it will be 10pm. Grandma Condition finally gets better and she is able to walk better and move around. Thank God for the Courage! Today, grandma come to the house and we sat down and have proper dinner, we make her laugh, and she is happy. Its been so long since I see she smile so happily.

During dinner, back then she used to cooked for lunch and dinner, because I was close to her, i use to talk to her when she cooks and help out like a little chef to her assistant. When I am home from school, she cooks my Fav noodle all time and guess what, till now I am using the recipe she gave me and asked my mum to do the same and whenever i cook mum use to say my cooking just taste like grandma's. I remember having bad gastric while walking back from school, grandma quickly cook my favorite noodle and feed me the hot soup. I treasure the moment.

Today, she sat next to me, I slice the meat to pieces, my sister get food on her plate and mum get her the soup. Dad of cause the vege and the dish cooking. HE IS MY PERSONAL MASTERCHEF forever with love Daddy Cooking the BEST of THE BEST. Grandma is weak now and she no longer energetic like how she use to be. One thing about grandma, she stroke my hair like when I was a kid. Still Do!! I love having her around me so much and I know nobody will ever bully as she is with me. 


I am grateful to Lord that I have the time and chance to show her love care and tender. Is nice to have my grandma with me! I enjoyed them really a lot.

Tuesday, July 3, 2012

Denials Land

Lately i have been working with the group in running and execution of the event. Promotional Items were good and to be very surprising, the students of the team make up of 3/4 industrial event industry players and most time is there to execute event. I am so happy that Our promotional items are launch, and the team are so brave to print without getting knowing of the Preview. Is exciting when people around the campus knows about the Event.

Sadly came to we know after all the promotional materials were printed, we were then told that the Alcohol Beverage company Logo were needed to be remove. Alright.

Very well, again question and observation came to my level of understanding. By removing the Logo does it make less people drinking? Or is just to make the instituion look more pleasant looking. I hate to say this but being in this country, Majority are in denial. In the campus there is this registered as commercial block, which is attach to the campus by seperations of the Lake. Well, in the commercial Area, Restaurants and Bars are Serving Alcohol beverage.

I do not understand what is the Different when the location and venue are the same. Is rather stupid to asked us get sponsors for the event and no one is attracted to those sponsor if we do not bring in alcohol beverages.

Be realistic. Student suppose to be expose to the real world rather than being blindfold to the reality of nature especially in handling event.

SO HOW MUCH LESSER DRINKER CAN THE EFFECT BRING BY NOT PLACING LOGO THERE BUT ALCOHOL BEVERAGE Company IS ONE OF the SPONSORS.

So which means you do not want to attract people to come for the festival. Is crazy!!! Madness and most of all brainless.!!!